Self-Compassion

19 March 2021

A Forgiveness Meditation

In this exercise you are invited to observe and acknowledge thoughts, emotions and physiological sensations, without judgement. Meditation helps us practise living in the present moment rather than worrying about future demands or feeling sad, angry or guilty about mistakes, experiences, or past misfortunes. Further, it requires a degree of openness to experience, which can only be achieved through perseverance and repetition. In mindfulness meditation, we are acknowledging, observing and acting towards our valued-life directions as opposed to changing, challenging or trying to make our experiences more positive. Moreover, we consider thoughts, emotions and sensations represent a small, every changing, part of who we are. In this light, they may come and go, be good or bad, without this impacting on our true being or sense of self. 

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How to practice forgiveness:

1) Wear comfortable, breathable clothing and sit in a restful position.

2) Notice your breath, breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth, for several seconds

3) Silently (or audibly) recite phrases of forgiveness, starting with people that you think you might have unwittingly treated unjustly or harmed. You may try, “If I have hurt or harmed anyone knowingly or unknowingly, I ask for their forgiveness.”

4) Notice any thoughts, physical sensations or emotions that might arise. You may find that this event might trigger memories, of other tough situations or persons you have come into contact with, under similar circumstances. Don’t push these feelings, sensations or thoughts away— you might notice you feel guilty, angry or sad, you might be having thoughts relating to self blame. Acknowledge their presence, bring your focus back to the present moment, focus on your breath and continue sending forgiveness towards any upcoming thoughts, sensations and emotions. Take as long as you need in this exercise. 

5) Next, begin to offer forgiveness to those who have not treated you justly or harmed you: “If anyone has hurt or harmed me, knowingly or unknowingly, I forgive them.”

4) Once again, resurfacing past painful thoughts and experiences may trigger a variety of sensations and emotions. As these feelings, images, and memories come up, you may simply recite, “I forgive you.”

5) Now, turn your attention to forgiving yourself. Most of us, have experienced self-blame from time to time, in different situations, perhaps in our relationships, or when experiencing a stressful situation. For this final stage reiterate: “For all of the ways I have hurt or harmed myself, knowingly or unknowingly, I offer myself forgiveness.”

6) Finally, slowly bring your attention back to the room you are in, what, if any, sounds do you hear? Do you notice any smells? Continue slowly breathing through your nose and out through your mouth for several seconds... If you had your eyes closed, slowly open your eyes, look around and start to move from your original position. 

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